11 Epic Tips For Dads When Your Wife Goes On A Girls Trip | 1-6 year old Advice for Dads
Is your wifey leaving you and going on an epic girls trip? Here are the cheat tips you need to know dad, to get through this.
My kids are currently 2 and 5 years old and my wife has taken off on a 5 day no kids or husband getaway with her obnoxious girlfriends (ie. Sheena Lakshman for calling out my last rant)
I’m happy as hell for her and I want her to have the best time and come back relaxed and refreshed. So I am going to do everything in my power to make this work.
There is one problem though “how the fuck do I work and be mom and dad at the same time”?
It is going to be an interesting run and I am going to keep adding to this as I figure out new tips and tricks for dads to get through a girl trip.
11 Tips for Dads when your wife goes on a girls trip
Use the shit out of the dishwasher
When you have kids, it is inevitable that you will go through dishes like no tomorrow. I’m warning you, if you get behind in the dishes you will go absolutely crazy. The easiest way around this is to have the dishwasher going all day.
My kids take their plates and cups everywhere in the house. As I walk around the place I pick them up and put them right into the dishwasher so that I don’t have to clean a pile of dishes or even think about cleaning a pile of dishes.
If you get behind, you are going to have to do them after you put the kids down.
2. Brush their teeth, change them and bath them at the same time
I have 2 kids, I tried doing this separately and it took me a shit load of time. When I batched their change routines together, it made life easier and it sped up the process. As for brushing their teeth, I would get them to start doing it on their own first. You step in and do the deep brush one by one while the other is playing around with the tooth brush.
When you are giving them a bath, ask “who is ready to come out”? Whichever one answers first, soap them up and shampoo their hair. This process should take no longer than 3 minutes to do. Especially if you are letting them chill in the tub for a while prior to you taking them out.
When you get one out of the tub, cream them up and change them right away while the other is in the tub. When the other one see’s what is happening they will be more likely to want to come out.
When the kids are in the tub it is a great time for you to have a few minutes to yourself, cherish these moments as if they were your last…. When they get out they will either be hyper or tired. So who knows what’s going to happen next.
3. Meal prep
When you are taking care of the kids by yourself, you will find it is a constant cycle of feeding.
First you feed them breakfast, and it better damn well be ready when they want it lol. Then there will be a snack, after that there will be lunch and then more snacks and then treats and then dinner and finally more snacks.
At night you can look forward to having to give them milk in the middle of the night.
How crazy is this? I can’t believe moms and stay at home dads deal with this on the daily, but they do. My secret cheat for this is to prep a whole bunch of shit at the same time. After they go to sleep, pre-prepare a whole bunch of snacks for the next day. Then pre-prepare their breakfast at the least so that you just have to pop it in the oven. Cut up the fruit and veggies the night before, who cares what they say about fresh veggies, we are talking about your sanity here.
4. Put your coffee on a timer
I say this for 2 reasons; one because your kids will wake up mad early no matter what. And second because if you forget to make your coffee, the morning may be so busy that you will not even get a chance to have one.
Have you ever looked at a mom with crazy hair and bags under their eyes? That’s what I look like this weekend. It’s fucking crazy.
5. Beat off
Let’s face it, when you are home alone with the kids there is not much adulting going on. You may have a few tender moments by yourself but it is no substitute for a significant other. Being with kids all day for multiple days will wear you down. Take moment to yourself to relax and remind yourself that this will be over soon. (hopefully she comes home lol)
6. Have a drink
Does this make me a bad dad? I don’t know, or really give a shit. When the kids go down, I pour myself a glass of celebratory wine to remind myself that I made it through the day successfully.
I am not a shitty dad that feeds my kids shit, or allows them to sit on the TV all day. I am actively doing shit with them, I have to show their mother, “I got this”.
7. Make the kids clean their own damn toys
My kids are lucky as shit as we usually clean up a lot after them. While my wife was away, I made them clean all of their toys before we did anything. “You want to go to the birthday party?” “Clean your toys”…”You want to watch a movie?” “Clean your toys”….”You want to go to the park?” “Clean your toys”….
If they don’t listen, tell them that you are going to be cleaning and that the vacuum will pick them up and they will be lost forever. This will put a fire under them to get started.
8. Change Diapers often
If you wait it will be a fucking big mess. Don’t wait. If it is a pee diaper and you wait the pee will seal through on your couch or bed then you will have a bigger cleaning job. If it is a poo diaper, the shit will find its way out somehow and create a bigger headache for you.
9. Don’t plan too many things
I had made this plan to keep the kids so busy that they would not miss their mom too much. Really it was a plan to prevent too much crying. BIG FAIL. I planned so many things that they were tired and grumpy and so was I.
First of all you will be tired just doing the daily routine you are not used to. Then you will be exhausted from dealing with so many little people emotions. Try to chill out and relax. You are doing a good job… they are alive right? Spend quality one on one time. That is priceless.
10. Work with them.
I am a realtor, and a busy house flipper. I have mad shit going on all the time, so I had to take my kids on a few meetings and to different job sites. This can work out in your benefit in some ways.
If you are dealing with people that are parents, they will empathize and maybe even sympathize with you. For example, my workers that were parents stepped up to the plate and went and bought material themselves for once. I just had to transfer them money.
In my real estate business my client helped me watch the kids while I took pictures of their home. It was interesting, I thought it was going to be unprofessional and my clients loved it!
11. Eat what they Eat
I wish this article could go out to all parents to read. If you will not eat what your kids are eating, why the hell would you feed it to them? I have my meal routines and so do my kids. I find that a lot of parts of their diet are healthier than mine and a part of mine is healthier than theirs.
It was an interesting thing to break down. So what did I do about it? I merged the 2 diets… It was great, i gave them the best parts of my diet and I took the best part of theirs.
We all want our kids eating better and I don’t care what you say, the system is not perfect. For a moment my kids thought it was really neat eating what dad eats, and I also enjoyed eating more of what they ate.
It also makes preparing meals easier for you dad. So take my advice and do it.