How to Feel Good About Your Self Image

looking and feeling your best

I encourage all people to try to look and feel your best. It will positively affect all areas of your life from your social life, sexual life, to your your career and not only because you physically look and feel good. When you feel good about yourself there is positivity flowing through you, it helps a person get rid of some of the unnecessary noise happening in their live and helps you concentrate on more important things. It help you move forward with you endeavours with new confidence and helps to give you greater self worth.

So what do you want to feel like?____________________

What do you want to look like?_________________________

Why do you feel like you should be this way?_________________________

If you did look and feel like this how will it impact your life? (what more could you do confidently?)

The media proposes that women should look like a Kardashian right now and that men should look like the rock or Thor lol. This is totally unrealistic and these types of looks are not what everyone can achieve or should even aspire to achieve. We have all been given genetics by our parents and we have to live with what we are given and make the best out of it. Simply be the best you! Every year whats hot changes, and what is hot is also in the eye of the beholder. For example in the united states, France, England etc. it was considered many years ago that women be so skinny that it bordered on anorexia. This caused major issues heath wise for people, how the hell can they look like this? They would have to starve themselves. As a man I always looked at women trying to look like this in disgust as to me it looked unhealthy, but many did think this was hot because of media trends and this is what the models looked like. Now in 2018 we are in an era where more voluptuous is considered attractive. You no longer see the anorexic models, actually they are starting to ban this type of behaviour in modelling! Meanwhile while the Americans think this is hot, in the caribbean and south america the trend is towards larger women. So while some larger women are punishing themselves in the US, England, France and Australia they are not realizing that they are be highly desirable to a shitload of people out there! We live in a multicultural society, everyone desires different things. I remember recently having a conversation with a friend of mine where I made a comment about a beautiful woman  that was sitting a few tables away from me while I was out having a drink. I said “fuck she is hot”, my buddy that was sitting with me and who I think is much better looking than me (according to the media), says no man she’s not my type. I need some more meat on the bones, something to hold on to. I thought she was so hot and he thought the opposite! This helped me realize that THE MEDIA DOES NOT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT!! They are helping create self image issues to sell clothes, diets, magazines and more instigating shitty not good enough emotions in people. Fuck, them stop buying their shit.

I was recently put through a situation with a family member of mine that I love dearly overdosed on drugs and was admitted in the hospital. All of her bodily functions were shutting down and she was admitted to the ICU and put on life support. Her story and self image issues helped to get her to the state she was in and I believe this is her rock bottom….hopefully. When she was young her parents were involved in a very messy Divorce, neither parent handled this well. Both parents were too busy with their own lives and issues to pay attention to their children and they both became dependent on alcohol and drugs.  The result is the mother abandoning her 2 children and moving to another city offering little to no contact, and the father ending up in long term treatment programs lasting many years. The children were left to fend for themselves, they bounced around to various family members homes and they lashed out in every way they could. The son got involved in a violent gang and the daughter began to mix with the wrong crowds.

The daughter had very low self worth and self esteem and when she surrounded herself or dated bad boys she found this as a form of power in her life. She was not confident in any area of her life other than “I AM BADASS”, she was not badass she was dumb. She dealt drugs, did drugs, went in and out of prison for many things and finally in the end she ended up on life support. I recently found out that she was also regularly sexually abused and thinks that this is normal in the life of a female IT IS NOT! Her boyfriend that she loved dearly used to abuse her regularly. She had no self value for her body, her mind and her soul.

The reason I bring this up is because many around the world allow themselves to be abused and abuse themselves regularly. They need to stop acting like bitches and start making minor improvements in how they look at themselves every day. By doing this they will create respect for themselves at the same time. Every chapter in this book is to help people look at themselves in better light and “do something about it!” It is a slap in your face to wake up.

I have a bad habit of trying to fix peoples problems, it doesn’t help unless a person really wants to change what they are. In her case there are many things she needs to do starting with her soul. She needs to find a purpose, why is she here and how can she help make the world better. Religion is one way many people heal their souls. Join a church group, therapy group where there are some people with similar stories. This can help you begin healing together. From there a person needs to find love. This is a general statement, it does not have to be love for another, it has to be love for yourself. Brainstorm here and write down what you actually like about yourself. Dig really deep to your core being, do you have good thoughts? Do you want to do good things? Do you want to be better?

There are many books on healing yourself inside and I cannot go through nor do I know all of the ways  to do this. I do know it all will start with you envisioning what you want to be, then you need to take small steps every day to be what you envision yourself to be.

Growing up I had major problems in this area like many children do. I was picked on and this chased me to hang with the wrong crowd so that I could feel power and control. It did not fit the vision I had for myself but it did feel good, like a drug. Now I envision myself in a very different light. Maybe a more mature light, I want to be an active father that will never have a regret on the way I raise my children,  a good husband, a good lover, sexy, good at sports, socially respected, money maker, strong mentally and physically, a fundraiser for the poor and much more. I am making active steps every day to achieve this goal and doing these little things every day is also helping me be more confident in my self image. It is no longer just a vision, it is a project in the works. If you think of yourself as just there, you cannot improve because you are doing nothing to be better. I allocate time for my children everyday, making sure they are getting the time they need from me. I allocate time to my wife to be present in discussion and active sexually. I work on my personal heigene and keep trimmed so that I feel good about how I look, I also go to the gym to keep improving how I look and feel physically…..small things that are adding up to my desired self image.

Your self image will also continue to change as you improve making you even better! Now that I have achieved some of the goals I set out for myself I want to give back and help others achieve great things. I now have a new self image that I will be pursuing, I want to help poor children not only financially but also help them to become something better than what they are given. This will be a task but it will happen as long as I do one small thing every day to achieve this goal.

When you go to any bank and speak to a financial advisor they will talk to you about your long term goals and short term goals. They will then talk to you about compounding interest. Think of yourself this way…. Long term you want to be like X. In the short term do something small to get there. All of your small inputs will compound and help you achieve your long term goal. You can take this even further making yourself great! Once you achieve your long term goal keep compounding and you will be greater and greater.

This is a simple recipe for success in all parts of your life.

Mimic someone you look up to. I have seen this work wonders for people around me. I met a young man that was failing in his career, social life, health…. basically in all ways. I became a person this young man wanted to be like although I am on my own journey of growth. He started to copy how I spoke, how I dressed, what I did etc. At first it was infuriating but then I realized I needed to change my perspective. I allowed it. This young man started doing better in his career making a lot more money, he looks better, feels better, has a family and now has gone over and above! He quit drinking and is focused on becoming better. He now makes over $300k/ year, has a big house, beautiful wife and children and feels great!

This amazing transformation did not take forever, he achieved all of this in 3 years!! Do a little every day and you will be better. So GET OFF YOUR ASS!!